Chick Fantasies

Week 1 Fantasies

Yay!!! The season is finally here! We girls have been fantasizing about our favorite football fellas all year and now we finally get to watch them perform! After daydreaming endlessly about these hunks, we chicks think we have a pretty good idea which men have the goods to turn up the heat in the fantasy world. We have always been known for our loose lips, so we’ll gladly fill you in on our hunches as to who the studs and duds of Week 1 will be.

Fantasy Studs:
Matt Hasselbeck: After sitting on the bench watching Favre get all the action for 2 long years, this virile lad is chomping at the bit to sew his NFL oats. He may not have the lustiest of scoring partners up in Seattle, but beggars can’t be choosers. Matt will hook up with anyone at this point! And who can stop him? Certainly not the wimpy Browns?!
Vinny Testaverde: This Italian beefcake has seen his best day. But that won’t stop the old spitfire from blasting off with gusto as he tries to show off for his new coach and nubile, young receivers. Even with his newly svelte figure, Vinny won’t be able to keep up with Peyton’s unit – after all, young Manning is just hitting his prime. But he certainly will pump away enough to keep his fantasy owners smilin’.
Jamal Anderson: We chicks must admit we were a little nervous about drafting this dirty, little bird. After all, nagging knee injuries can make a man go limp at anytime. However, we think he’ll start the season in style as he works his magic with the 49’ers. Those San Fran lads sure love to do a lot of scoring; but unfortunately the defenders also have a penchant for watching other men score. Maybe they’re just too nice to spoil a good man’s fun!
Adam Vinatieri: Can you guys believe we actually included a kicker in our fantasies?! It doesn’t happen too often, but Adam certainly has the sizzling looks needed to rock our dreams. Besides, this little cutie can split the wanting uprights with the best of them! We think Adam will have lots of opportunites to score as his unit goes up against the sleazy Bengals. Without a tempting scoring partner, Drew may have difficulty getting the job done. That will leave it to this lusty kicker to seal the deal.

Fantasy Duds:
Robbie Johnson: Robbie may think he looks cute in his fancy little bandannas, but the Saints won’t be buying it. The Boys of the Big Easy are going to gobble up this Johnson and spit him out as his helpless line looks on. But don’t worry, Rob – we’re not just picking on you. The Saints will be making a lot of quarterbacks look ugly as they aggressively march their way towards the Super Bowl.
Emmitt Smith: We would love to sing praise to the last standing super-stud Cowboy. And we will, but not this week. Smith is getting to the age where he has to lower his standards a bit. The ugly boys of the NFL will certainly let him have his way with them, but the studs of the league will be rejecting him left and right. Warren “the Big Sac” Sapp and his pals are going to be very stingy when it comes to giving it up this season.